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Exclusive interview: Bill: I wanted to give up everything!

Bill had never been that thoughtful before!
Only in BRAVO the Tokio Hotel-front man explains why he is so sad sometimes.

BRAVO: Bill, are you happy?
Bill: Im totally happy with my career. Our new album Humanoid goes well. In most of the european countries its even better in the charts than the last two albums! I wish itd be like that in private. I dont know, what I need, to be satisfied but I am unsatisfied.

BRAVO: Do you have a reason for this?
Bill: Maybe because I dont have time, to be happy about what Ive reached. I can not be happy or celebrate our success. Because I always have to do something new. And theres still love missing. Sadly.

BRAVO: How could you find love?Could we help somehow?
Bill: I dont know it eigther. (sighs) There are a lot of people who try to find their love in reality shows. Bill in love wouldnt fit to me! To arrange feelings for a girl in front of a camera is not possible. That I get to know someone in private is improbable. I dont even get out of the house to shop.

BRAVO: Why dont you simply escape out of your world and go out without securiety?
Bill: To be honest I dont want to try that out, Im also scared of doing it. Especially in europe it is hard for me to visit a club on my own. Even if bodyguards are with me I feel like being in a photo or signing session. Then I feel like an animal in a zoo. But that comes with being a celebrity. Maybe I get to know someone via my job who knows? If love comes truely it happens by accident.

BRAVO: Are you satisfied with yourself then?
Bill: Sometimes I absolutely can not stand myself. Performance of myself, I dont watch them on TV I hate myself! It also annoys me I always think about something! That Im so nervous all the time and not relaxed.I always check if the door is locked twice. I almost check it ten times to be sure I hadnt forgot it. I guess I need to become more relaxed. Thats it.

BRAVO: Are you afraid of the future?
Bill: Yes. Who knows what Im doing in 5 or 10 years? My horror vision would be an office job! Thats nothing for me. At school I had authority problems, too. I can not listen to someone else but me. I hope, I can always be my own boss.

BRAVO: Do you freak out sometimes or are you always the nice guy?
Bill: Im absolutely full of emotions, I often screamed at the others or team members, when something went wrong or didnt fit to me.

BRAVO: How do we have to imagine a Tokio Hotel-argument?
Bill: We've bet each other in the past. Nowadays it's more psychological pressure.

BRAVO: Seriously? How do we imagine that?
Bill: We dont talk to each other anymore. Or we cancel some dates because we know it: If Im totally excited about the next photo-shooting and Toms angry about me then he cancels the shooting secretly. But everything is fine the following day.

BRAVO: Did anyone say in an argument:Thats enough! I leave.?
Bill: No one said this loudly yet, but the thought of it surely had everyone. There also were moments I thought: I don't want to do this anymore, I give up everything! ..and this thought is still in my mind: I think that I just want to have time for myself.

BRAVO: Could you explain some situations when you think like that?
Bill: When I dont know how to go on or if I dont have ideas anymore. Then there are days I only want to take my stuff not to have anything to do with that band. But in the end I think of all the fans again, of the energy and fun they give us, the fun being front man of Tokio Hotel.