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Dear geebs:

I don't really know how to tell you this, but our affair is over.I think I realized it that night in your camping car and I saw you ignore my avocado plant. I'm sure you're cowardly enough to understand that Santa doesn't exist. I'm returning the couch cushions to you, but I'll keep your photo as a memory. You should also know that I will tell the authorities the incarnation as an eskimo .

Greetings to your freaky family,
-caos-