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Marcus! Eat my shit and die!

Yea, you. You heard me. Have a fucking blast (beat). Eat shit.

Vituttaa, kun himoitsen aina raavaita miehiä ja niiden miehekästä tuoksua. Aah, jumalaista! Antaisin vasemman pallini jos vain pääsisin nuuhkimaan Justia oikein läheltä (ja ehkä hieman höyläämäänkin, *wink* *wink* ;)). Jotenkin saan Justilta semmosia viboja, ettei se kuitenkaan ole meikästä kiinnostunu. Saattaa olla jopa hetero. Noh, ehkä onnaa Teron kans.

RAKASTAN MIEHIÄ!

Missä mun bokserit on?

voi vitsi, just ku luulin että mun lapsuuden traumaattiset kokemukset on ohi...
taas mulla ilmeni virtsankarkailua. tätä on jatkunu jo yli viikon.
öisin pissa pääsee yllättämään. näen kummia unia pelikaaneista, ja hupsan keikkaa, loro on jo housussa. se haisee aina sipulilta, joka johtaa minut uskomaan että kävelen unissani ja syön maksapasteijoita. äitini ruukaa ostaa niitä minulle.
onneksi jalkasienet ovat parantuneet.

haluaisin vielä lisätä, että jeesus on löytänyt paikkansa sydämmessäni. täten tuomitsen kaikki epäkristilliset elämän epäkohdat. hus! hus paholaiset!

nähdään taas piippolan kuivat lakanat! nähdään taas rakas asuntolanhoitajani toini!

ps. kakan mukana tuli hampurilaisen siemeniä... tiedäthän, niitä siinä päällä. paitsi halpahampurilaismestoissa. ne on kaupallista humpuukia. ;)

Ok, a bit of shedding now.

Me and Teme had a birthdayparty last weekend in Snuukkeri's private room. The time I got there, people were a bit nervous about the rent, 'cause they were lacking about 20e. I paid the rest of the rent and tried to relax when we got inside the room and the rent was paid. The room was nice, it had a pooltable, a sauna, a widescreencanvas and somehow enough room for all of us.
There was supposed to be about 25 ppl coming, but some of them cancelled and some of them never showed up.

I was nervous all of the time (I don't even know why) and just kept jumping around the place to say hello to everyone who made their way to the parteh. I lit up my cigar and started to devour my first pint as the two of our friends rushed in. Quite drunk, frankly. Their gift for us were a set of fake glue-in-place nails. T'was kinda funny at first, but when these persons in question started to glue in the nails, an accident happened and the sink in the toilet fell down. I went all apeshit and ran off cursing. I went to the shower room to rip off the fake nails. Thanks for the present, I appreciate, but I hate long nails. They make me all crippled. I couldn't grab things while they were on and I got even more pissed off. Well, another participating party member, mr. "J", tried to fix the sink with Jesus-tape and condoms (?!) but it SURPRISINGLY didn't work for too long. So when I came out of the shower room I heard a loud "KLONG" from the toilet. The sink was lying on the floor and the plumming seemed like a knot. Nice.

I went apeshit double time now, desperately tried to do something about the sink. Mr. "E" gave me a helping hand to lift up the sink and make it lean against a chair. Me and Teme went to see the bartender, to tell him what happened and he followed us back to see people drinking their own drinks, which was gravely forbidden. The bartender wasn't that pissed about the sink, but the own-drinks-phenomena was worse. He wasn't that angry, more like disappointed, which was even worse, 'cause the staff there was always been nice to us and they even rented the place for us half off the normal price. We kinda failed their trust.

So! We ran the place empty and headed outside to carry on to the afterparty. Some called a cab, 'cause the distance to that certain rallypont was about 3-4km and it was cold outside. Most of the people took the cab, while me and Teme went off walking, 'cause there wasn't enough room in the taxi. "Birthday heroes walk" is the name of the game, eh? And yeah, it was so fucking funny. Luckily mr. "Z" and his random humour came walking with us as well as mr. "T".

Finally we arrived to the parteh, and I went to the cold sauna straight away to cool down a bit.
I don't want to mention all the shits and bits what happened in the party, but it included me being completely without booze (I drank 2 pints in the Snuukkeri, before we got kicked out) and me and Teme being left behind locks.
I bought a 3/4 empty bottle of rum from mr. "M" and we devoured it w/ Teme and I realised that I was getting drunk, while everybody else started sleeping.
Just about three things made me laugh:

1) Teme and Teppo being shit-faced.
2) Jesse and Arse-Teemu molesting me with a door. (Seriously, these guys ripped off a door just to shove it in my ass! They must LOVE me!)
3) The irony of the whole fucking thing. (We were planning that party for months, and it all came down big time.)

After that party every. Fucking. Single. Thing. Has been going astray. Everything! :---D
"Joka vitu asia kussee ja kunnolla, paskasaatana" as we say here in Oulu, Finland!

So the general yhteenveto:

- I lost a lot of money for nothing. And I know I'm not getting it back from anyone.

- I didn't get a single free beer. Vice versa, actually.

- Nothing went according to plan.

- We're possibly disliked in Snuukkeri after this shite.

- The bill for the sink might come afterwards. We have no money whatsoever to pay for it.

- I have a huge ITN-declaration written on my back. :D Cheers, Make!

- Going home is like entering a minefield.

- There's no one else to blame, than myself. :D

So thankyous and sorrys for everyone and death to traitors. :

---

)


-Otto-

http://www.petatv.com/tvpopup/Prefs.asp?video=fur_farm

Dekapitaatiohommia prkl.

Semmone meikä o. Tiesittekö? :D

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