I undesrstand how scissors
can beat paper, and I get
how a rock can beat
scissors, but there's no
fucking way paper can beat
rock. Is paper supposed to
magically wrap around rock
and leave it immobile? Why
the hell can't paper do
this to scissors? Screw
scissors, why can't paper
do this to people? Why
aren't sheets of college
ruled notebook paper
constantly suffocating
students as they take
notes in class? I'll tell
you why, because paper
can't beat anybody. A rock
would tear that shit up in
2 seconds. When I play
rock paper scissors, I
always choose rock. Then
when somebody claims to
have beaten me with their
paper I can punch them
with my already clenched
fist and say: Oh shit, I'm
sorry, I thought paper
would protect you, you
asshole...