IRC-Galleria

Q: What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
A: Pull the pin and throw it back.

---

Q: What does a blonde do when it gets cold?
A: Sits around a candle

Q: What does she do when it gets really cold?
A: Lights it

---

Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a vending machine?
A: Nothing.....you get what you paid for.

---

Q: Why did the blonde keep a picture of herself in her room?
A: So she could use it as a mirror.

---

Q: What did the blondes right leg say to the left leg?
A: Nothing. They've never met.

---

Q: What's the advantage of having a blonde as a girlfriend?
A: You get to park in handicapped zones.

---

Q: Two blondes are standing on top of the Empire State Building. How can you tell which one is the true blonde and which one is the bleached blonde?
A: The bleached blonde isn't throwing bread crumbs at the helicopters!

---

Q: Why did the blonde sell her television?
A: To buy a VCR!

"Will, It's just an aftershock!"
"Aftershock, baby I'm from philly. Aftershock is not in my vocabulary. Wind, rain, cheesestake, these are things I know."
"It's nothing, now would you come back over here?"
"M-mm,"
"Why not?!"
"Cause everytime I come near you the ground starts moving, I'm just trying to get back to philly, where the ground stays still, and the people move."

"I may never see my mom again!
I may never see Zimbabwe!
I may never dunk on Michael Jordan!
I may never see Rudy get married on the Cosbys"

Michael Jordan;
Al Capone;
Woody Wood Pecker;
Fred Flinstone

"Coach" Ken Carter - ""Nigger" is a derogatory termused to insult our ancestors. See, if a white man used it, you'd be ready to fight. Your using it teaches him to use it. You're saying it's cool. Well, it's not cool. And when you're around me, I don't wanna hear that shit. We clear?"
Richmond Oilers - "Yes, sir."

"Coach" Ken Carter - "Well, not quite your storybook ending, huh? Not for us, anyway. But you men played like champions. You never gave up. And champions hold their heads high. What you achieved goes way beyond the win-loss column or what's gonna be written on the front page of the sports section tomorrow. You've achieved something that some people spend their whole lives trying to find. What you achieved is that ever-elusive victory within. And, gentlemen, -, I am so proud of you. Four months ago, when I took the job at Richmond, I had a plan. That plan failed. I came to coach basketball players, and you became students. I came to teach boys, and you became men. And for that, I thank you. If someone walked in this door right now and offered me the coaching job at any school in the state of California, you know which team I'd choose?"

Jaron "Worm" Willis - "St. Francis? "

Laughs

Jaron "Worm" Willis - "I'm just saying, man."

"Coach" Ken Carter - "Kenyon?"

Kenyon Stone - "Richmond?"

"Coach" Ken Carter - "Rich wha!?"

Kenyon Stone - "Richmond."

"Coach" Ken Carter - "Rich wha!?"

Richmond Oilers - "Richmond."

"Coach" Ken Carter - "Rich wha!?"

Richmond Oilers - "Richmond!"

"Coach" Ken Carter - "Where we from!?"

Richmond Oilers - "Richmond!"

"Coach" Ken Carter - "What's my hometown!?"

Richmond Oilers - "Richmond!"

"Coach" Ken Carter - "What do we love!?"

Richmond Oilers - "Richmond!"

"Coach" Ken Carter - "Rich wha!?"

Richmond Oilers - "Richmond!"

"She told me we couldn't afford beer anymore and I'd have to quit.

Then I caught her spending $65 for makeup.

And I asked how come I had to give up stuff and she didn't.

She said she needed makeup to look pretty for me.

I told her that was what the beer was for.

I don't think shes coming back"

My dick cost a late night fee
Your dick got the HIV
My dick plays on the double feature screen
Your dick went straight to DVD

My dick- bigger than a bridge
Your dick look like a little kid's
My dick- large like the Chargers, the whole team
Your shit look like you fourteen

My dick- locked in a cage, right
Your dick suffer from stage fright
My dick- so hot, it's stolen
Your dick look like Gary Coleman

My dick- pink and big
Your dick stinks like shit
My dick got a Caesar do,
Your dick needs a tweezer, dude

My dick is like super size
Your dick look like two fries
My dick- more mass than the Earth
Your dick- half staff, it needs work

My dick- been there done that
Your dick sits there with dunce cap
My dick- V.I.P.
Your shit needs I.D.

It's time that we let the world know
Dude, you gotta let your girl go
D.S. is the best in the business
P.S. we got dicks like Jesus

It's time that we let the world know
Dude, you gotta let your girl go
D.S. is the best in the business
P.S. we got dicks like Jesus

My dick need no introduction
Your dick don't even function
My dick served a whole lunch-in
Your dick- it look like a munchkin

My dick- size of a pumpkin
Your dick look like Macaulay Culkin
My dick- good good lovin'
Your dick- good for nothin'

My dick bench pressed 350
Your dick couldn't shoplift at Thrifty
My dick- pretty damn skimpy
Your dick- hungry as a hippie

My dick don't fit down the chimney
Your dick is like a kid from the Philippines
My dick is like an M16
Your dick- broken vending machine

My dick parts the seas
Your dick farts and queefs
My dick- rumble in the jungle
Your dick got touched by your uncle

My dick goes to yoga
Your dick- fruit roll-up
My dick- grade-A beef
Your dick- Mayday geek

My dick- sick and dangerous
Your dick- quick and painless
My dick- 'nuff said.
Your dick loves Fred

It's time that we let the world know
Dude, you gotta let your girl go
D.S. is the best in the business
P.S. we got dicks like Jesus

It's time that we let the world know
Dude, you gotta let your girl go
D.S. is the best in the business
P.S. we got dicks like Jesus

Jason Lyle:
Sir they can cut the chain off the door, but they can't make us play.

Damien Carter:
We've decided were gonna finish what you started sir.

Worm:
Yeah, so leave us be coach, we got shit to do sir.



Timo Cruz:
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate,
our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure,
it is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us,
your playing small does not not serve the world,
there is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you,
we were all meant to shine as children do,
it's not just in some of us it's in everyone,
and as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same,
as we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.
Sir I just wanna say thank you, you saved my life.

Coach Carter:
Thank you sirs, all of you.