"The PETA you don't know would outlaw fishing, circuses, dog shows, horseback riding and zoos. They even oppose using service animals like eye-dogs for the blind.
Fucking blind bastards torturing those dogs!
In PETA, there's no room for Kentucky Fried Chicken, or the Kentucky Derby. See you, Shamu!
And forget about smearing honey dew over your fuck buddy, because even bees are persecuted by the man.
And pets are forbidden in PETA's world too. That's right! No pets. Hey all you pet lovers who donate to PETA- Feel like a sucker yet?"
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