"No son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies, and kid's with fake ID's." - Homer
"Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try." - Homer
"Lisa, remember me as I am - filled with murderous rage." - Homer
"Hey, what's the big deal about going to some building every Sunday? I mean, isn't God everywhere?" - Homer
"Stupid risks make life worth living." - Homer
"I don't think anything I've ever done is wrong!" - Homer
"Remember to rebel against the authorities, kids!" = Homer
"Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand." - Homer
"I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?" - Homer
"To alcohol! The cause of, and solution too, all of lifes problems." - Homer